Dear Jonathan,
It is December 23rd and I'm begining to miss you more and more this Christmas. I keep reminding myself of all the great Christmas memories that we had together but I want just one more. Well maybe many more! I miss getting gifts from you that you find around the house , that already belonged to me, dad , or the kids. I actually miss having to give them back after Christmas to. I miss all of it and you. I just dont know how many Christmas's I a have to go through before it gets easier. I want to be able to buy you things and I want you to be the first one to wake dad and I in the morning like you use to. No matter how early it is! If I could just wake up this Christmas to you standing over me and saying "its Christmas come on get up, lets open gifts, I will get Bridget and Derek up" I would be so happy. I wouldnt ask for another thing ever again. And back to reality I go , because I know this is never gonna happen.

I know that we will get to spend Christmas together again and I can not wait for the day. I dont think that we know what Christmas is really like here on earth but I bet when we gt to Heaven we will find out and will be magical. I can not wait for the Christmas where your gift comes in the form of a hug and another I love you and I cant wait to return that gift. I love you dearly and Merry Christmas

Love,
Mom